I wasn’t going to post today because I’m all cranky and sad and who the hell wants to read about that? Not mention I’ve covered that topic ad nauseum. Then I was looking for a video my sister told me to watch when she was here and our internet was particularly sucking ass, (I Love the Way You Lie, with Eminem and Rihanna AND it turns out Me.gan F.ox and Ho.bbit number 2. Or 3. It was weird. I wasn’t expecting to be all turned on by an abusive relationship between fired Transfor.mers girl and abusive Ho.bbit boy. I’m all discombobulated.) when I realized I started The Two Songs That…for just this reason. To cheer myself up and just write. I’m starting this pretty late, so hopefully I can finish before nap is over, so that will explain the abbreviated writings if necessary. Without further ado I shall bring to you The Two Songs That I Would Do During Drunken Karaoke. I don’t do karaoke. I don’t sing well period, I’ve had small children ask me to stop. But there is a remote possiblitly I would sing these 2 songs because 1. I inexplicably have them memorized, and 2. They are in my vocal range; read, male not trying very hard. I don’t know either. Here they are nonetheless.
First up. Date Rape by Sublime. This is the first time I’ve seen this video and her shiny outfit is killing me. Ahh the 90’s. Ron Jeremy as the judge? I don’t even know what to say. For some reason I’ve always liked this song, hopefully I’m not offending anyone, the rapist did get convicted…
The second is The Bad Touch by Bloodhound Gang which is wholly inappropriate but I LOVE them anyway. All of their songs are inappropriate, but damn funny.
G is up and on my lap so I have to go, but these songs did as I hoped and I’m smiling. I hope you are too.
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excellent. also? slightly disturbing. thanks, i think ...
ReplyDeleteI think "disturbing" is probably the nicest way to describe my musical tastes. :)
DeleteI love Date Rape. The song, obviously.
ReplyDeleteDrunken karaoke, oh boy. My friend used to run it at "our" bar. The entertainment company he worked for roped him into judging some karaoke contest at other bars, which meant I got roped into it too. Straight chicks will hit on other straight chicks if they think it'll help them win. *shudder* I never, ever went on stage alone, but I was part of a piss ass wasted group effort several times. How piss ass, you ask? Someone yelled at me to sing the proper words, pointed out that they were on the screen two feet in front of my face and I couldn't see them. I *still* hear about that one.
Hahaha! The only time I've actually done it was with about 20 other drunken people, aka every person in the bar, to Bohemian Rapsody so it kinda doesn't count I think.
DeleteOoh, oooh, another good karaoke story -- the DJ (my friend's boss this time) offered free drinks to anyone who would sing "Come on Eileen", so four or five of us went up, just to get the drinks, (I'm not sure why, the bartenders never charged me.) and the DJ offered them to us if we'd stop about 30 seconds into the song.
ReplyDeleteI'm pretty sure I'd make a killing in offers to get me to stop as well.
DeleteI would pay good dolla bills to hear you drunkenly sing either or both of these songs. Actually I would pay more of those dolla bills to sing that Bloodhound Gang song along with you and some other equally drunken bloggers at Blogher.
ReplyDeleteThat would be fucking awesome.
DeleteI'm practicing the Bad Touch dance just to be prepared in case I ever have to sing it.
ReplyDeleteYou seem like a great mom, but thankfully this blog is not a domestic retreat, more of a waystation for bizarre thinking(from someone like me, that is a compliment). ~Mary
ReplyDeleteI realize this and am flattered. Thank you!
Delete